Why Putting Other People First is Bad for Your Soul

Although we have been taught that "good people" put other's needs ahead of their own, it turns out that doing so often causes resentment. Resentment is a poisonous sentiment that sooner or later can leak out in the form of snide remarks and hurtful "jokes." Such internal stress also compromises the immune system of the person feeling the resentment.

Can you imagine what a wonderful world it would be if everyone were following their heart, living a joyful, struggle-free life?

Haven't we all been taught that altruism (defined as unselfish concern for the welfare of others) is the highest degree of "being a good person?" Well, maybe . . . if you are a saint. But please consider, if you are consciously on a path of spiritual growth, isn't your devotion and loyalty to the call of your soul your most important and highest calling?

So how does your soul call to you? Easy. Through your heart's desires. Ah, but haven't you been told that it is selfish to do what you want? Yes, and please consider the source. Isn't it the people "in authority" (whoever they may be in your life) who want you to do as they please? Aren't they the ones who have indoctrinated you into believing that loyalty to them assures your "place in heaven?"

I remember the first time I was introduced to the idea of "following my heart." I actually snorted a guffaw at the idea! "If I did what I wanted, my life would fall apart," I spouted to the woman who later became my spiritual growth mentor. I had a business to run, bills to pay, and a life to keep in order!

Oh . . . I had so much to learn about how joyful life can be. Once I stopped acting like the Wizard of Oz (pulling the levers and pushing the buttons, trying to control my life) and surrendered to the flow of life, I found out that the greatest gift I give to myself, my family and friends and the world is having a life that works . . . a life that is joyful and struggle-free.

I can tell you it wasn't easy making room for my heart to have an equal voice with my rational/logical mind. I was pretty certain of my mental abilities and trusted them implicitly. They had brought me very far in the material world. But little-by-little, I let go of my grip and, ever so slowly, began to let life flow through me.

It has been quite a ride—analogous in a lot of ways to a white-water river rafting adventure! Going with the flow. Ouch! Crashing into boulders in the middle of the river is painful, but oh so enlightening!

I am not advocating stealing candy from babies, or abandoning performing random acts of kindness, but I am urging you to consider that when you are living your life in alignment with your soul's calling, you begin to radiate a joy and sense of well-being that is intensely more healing, soothing and nurturing to people in your life than "sucking it up" and "nose to the grindstone" response to every request that comes your way.

Really . . . it does no one any service to render help while feeling resentful. Have the courage to follow your heart, make your life work, and be a ray of sunshine of joy and happiness in the world.

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