How To Transform Your Life
To save on waffle, I'm going to come straight to the point. To sort your life out, be yourself. This works because I have done it and it's not that hard either. There are all sorts of books and website about being yourself and they usually get you to "write down all the positive things about you" and all that kind of crap which doesn't help or work. In life, do what works, don't do what doesn't. Being yourself works. It transforms your life from stress and hassle and insecurity to one which flows with ease and happiness. Why? I have my theories on why which I shall come to in a minute, but first let me explain how to be yourself.
To be yourself is easy. You don't have to do anything!! That's how easy it is! In practical terms, to be yourself, this is what you do:
Only speak when you feel like speaking and have something to say.
Only do something when you feel like doing something.
Do not speak when you don't feel like it or nothing comes to mind to say.
Do not do anything that you don't feel like doing.
There, you have something to work with now. Before you dismiss this as selfish behavior, allow me to explain it. It isn't selfish. Have you ever known someone who commands huge respect from everyone by having the strength and self-respect to only talk when they feel the need to and only do things when they feel like it? The reason they command respect is because people can pick up on the huge respect they have for themselves. They do not placate people and put on a mask in order to please. They are not constantly trying to be accepted by other people by pretending to be someone they are not. They love themselves so much that they are not prepared to act like someone else. They have the strength to be themselves. As a result, they do not have to fret over who they are. They are free from neurosis about their identity. They can walk into a room without having to worry about how they are coming across to others.
Not being yourself takes more effort than being yourself because by pretending to be someone else requires effort. Being yourself just requires you to be, pure and simple. You don't even have to think about what to do. In fact, one way to start this whole new process is to sit in a chair and just wait until you feel the urge to do something or say something.
One other thing to mention is that it will take time to feel comfortable with being yourself. It will feel strange for a day or two. Then, what happens is quite remarkable. You suddenly notice yourself talking a lot more, doing a lot more and it's all so easy. You don't have to think about it. You are free from the burdens of neurosis about whether you're appearing to other people well enough, whether you're rich enough, whether you're this or that that you used to feel you should be. When you are happy with yourself, nothing else matters. It is a true state of peace and spiritual freedom that totally sorts your whole life out. Once you are in this position where you have reconnected with yourself, you can then go on to great success with your new-found deeply-held confidence.
The hard thing will be when someone talks to you and you don't have anything to say back to them. Most people would normally manufacture some words back to that person in an attempt to appear normal. However, if you have nothing to say, say nothing. No matter what reaction you get from the other person. This is where you have to be strong and have faith in yourself. You are too important to go and sell yourself out to people by trying to be what they want you to be. Be yourself. You do not have to find yourself, because you already are yourself. All you need to do is be yourself by the method I have mentioned above. You will find that, after a few days of following the method, that you will have an answer for anything that anyone says to you. Words will just appear in your head that are right for that situation. It is like being on auto-pilot. You will no longer be troubled by the constant question, "what shall I say?" Whatever you need to say will come to you at the right time that you need it. This is just the way it works. I didn't invent the universe but this is just how it seems to work.
Best of luck and get in contact if you want to.
JB
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